" /> such a long drive: July 2004 Archives

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July 26, 2004

I'm two today

I was informed by a couple of friends that today my journal is two years old... so, of course I thought it would be appropriate that I write a little tribute entry. Two years sounds so short, but thinking back I realize how much I have really changed, and how much has changed in my life. I feel like a different person, but yet it is all pretty well tracked (okay, so I skipped a couple of months!!) in this journal. I'm so glad I started "My Attempt at a Cool Online Journal" and have shared bits and pieces of my life with all of you. It has strengthened and even made some friendships of mine. It has let me say things to people that I could never say any other way. Oh yes... and have any of you noticed it has a new look?! Look! Wow! Blue on the sides, slightly more modern... yes, this was all done by Jenna as part of the plan to keep the comment spammers under control. They were hitting me hard.

So I was looking back at some of my old entries, and I saw "Tribute to the lunch table" , one of my all time favorites, and I remembered that Courtney and I tweaked one of the lines in there for the class song. "The sophmores in us are gone" became "the freshmen in us are gone"... because, ya know, you start high school as a freshmen and it's a class song so it can't be that artsy. So thinking of that, and keeping with the whole "time moves on" theme, and thinking of someone who I know always seems to appreciate stuff like this, I'm going to post the lyrics to the song here. I'm sure you can find the meaning behind a lot of them right here in this journal. Sing along if you know 'em...

Do you remember your high school days
watching the team winning their plays
and watching the band at the half time show
now you can't believe how fast time goes by

Chorus (After every verse):
So let go of the things you thought would never change
say hello to new laughter and new pain
the freshmen in us are gone
things will never be the same

Then there was that one first love
that you couldn't get enough of
you'd make up, you'd break up, and then you'd cry
with your friends by your side

If I were to give one piece of advice
of how to travel on through this life
it would be to hold your head up high
when you don't think you can get by

We may go our different ways
but we won't forget yesterday
the times we laughed, the tears we cried
now we must say goodbye

So say goodbye...

(If you don't know the melody some of that probably doesn't seem to rhyme to you, (you know, kind of like snow and world) but it does. Show rhymes with goes. And it fits. So there, smarty pants.)

Yay for memories. I'm two years old today.

July 20, 2004

for as long as I can...

... I'm going to write a small list of what love is to me, as I know it today

- not remembering how I could have possibly fallen in love so fast
- finally truly understanding everything the movies describe
- not having to say I love you, because it's just so obvious
- being afraid to say I love you, because it's just so obvious
- being able to talk for all hours of the night and realizing that sleep doesn't really matter
- understanding when he crashes early because I have spent too many nights keeping him awake
- dreaming about him day and night, night and day
- thinking about him the instant I wake up (also known as "waking up happy")
- knowing that I would rather be with him than anyone else I've ever met, or will ever meet
- thinking he is the most attractive guy in the world
- writing songs about him that have sincere lyrics with no trouble
- loving pictures of the two of us just because he makes me look so damn good (honest smiles do that to you naturally)
- unconditional and unlimited hugs
- never being tired of his kisses
- taking every bit of his words as wise words of wisdom
- laughing out loud at his jokes, even when they might not be funny to other people
- growing with him
- truly loving hearing every moment of his day
- knowing him better than anyone in the world
- him knowing me better than anyone in the world
- understanding that even if I fall out of love, it never really goes away
- understanding that just because you fall out of love doesn't mean you weren't in it
- never wanting to hang up
- never wanting to grow up
- never wanting to grow apart

But sometimes, the last three just have to happen.

July 18, 2004

by public demand

Current Music: Sunsets Across The Horizon - Paul Starling/Brian Bringelson (I love this song, by the way)

So, I'm writing this mainly because I have gotten a few complaints. I have had a few urges to write lately; now, thinking back to them, I realize that they have been at points when I have felt extremely happy, and right now, pretty sad. Actually, I'm feeling better now. I listened to the song mentioned above a couple of times and I feel a lot better. It's by my friend Brian that I met in California (someone that I also managed to indirectly get into Jump from across the country, which is very exciting to me).

Speaking of Brian... speaking of California... I'm kind of in a heartbreaking point about that trip right now. I never thought it would turn out to mean so much, but it did. I don't even know when I'll ever get to go back out there, or if it will ever be the same when I do. When I talk to them now... it's like... I'm just in Georgia again. I don't know, it's so hard to describe. I just wish I could be a part of two lives at once.

But on to the great GREAT happy moments I have been having lately. I've been playing this open mic in Athens for the past couple of weeks, and when I did it last I got a really great response even though I felt sort of off (bar people are easier to entertain than your average crowd.. that helped too). BUT right after that, the fabulous guy that runs the open mic (I think the owner), Chris, told me that if I "promise to keep coming back for weeks... for months..." then he will pay for me to get a brand spanking (working) pick up in my guitar. WOW. This freakin' made my day. Then I really knew it was all meant to happen when on the drive home they only played good music. One good song after another. It was amazing. I was really happy that night (also thanks to a GREAT meal made by Jenna and a nap and my first day at work) and I wanted to write a journal. But I didn't. So I'm writing it now.

Today, I'm in love with:
1) cute guy at orientation who has a girlfriend and is living in east campus
2) text messaging
3) my new cd player alarm clock
4) a guy in California
5) Brian's song
6) the idea of being in love again, thanks to Love Actually

Love actually is all around.